How to be a great chess player

Thursday, July 23, 2009



Frank “Boy” Pestaño
Chessmoso

WHAT makes a good chess player? Some say it is talent or hard work or both. Nonsense—what distinguishes a good chess player from a bad one is the precise knowledge of his chess horoscope!

You need to know your good and bad days, when to trade off queens early and when to play the French.

In astrology, a horoscope is a chart or diagram representing the positions of the Sun, Moon, planets, at the time of an event, such as the moment of a person’s birth.

This article is written to celebrate the longest solar eclipse in this century that covered the India and was also partially visible in the Philippines and other parts of Asia last Wednesday.

Solar eclipses abound in superstitions and some say it is caused when a bakonawa swallows the sun. Another myth says the sun rays, during an eclipse, can harm
unborn children.

Sun.Star has a horoscope as a testament to its popularity. Here now is your horoscope of the week.

Aries The Ram (March 21 to April 19). You are the pioneer type and hold most horoscopes in contempt. You play chess with dead people. People can’t wait until you are dead. You should sell insurance. (Korchnoi, Kasparov, Smyslov, Najdorf).

Taurus The Bull (April 20 to May 20).You show no original thought. Most people think you are stubborn. Sometimes you play chess with God. You think astrology is a bunch of Taurus. (Spielmann, Steinitz, Euwe).

Gemini the Twins (May 21 to June 20). People say you are too boring. You expect too much for too little. This means you are cheap. Most of your games are won by swindles. Go home and collect stamps. (Karpov, Reti, Short, Petrosian).

Cancer the Crab(June 21 to July 22). You are sympathetic to your opponents and give up draws too easily. Opponents think you are a sucker. You like gambits and taking poisoned pawns. (Bird, Benko, Gelfand).

Leo the Lion(July 23 to Aug. 22).You consider yourself a born leader. Most Leos are bullies, vain and dislike criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. You expect people to throw coins at you every time you win a game. (Judit Polgar, Marshall,Botvinnik).

Virgo the Virgin (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22). You are cold and sometimes fall asleep while making love. Take up music and remember pawns are the souls of chess. (Philidor, Zukertort, Koltanowski).

Libra the Scales (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22).You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. Its hard for you to accept losses. You suffer from penile envy. See a shrink. (Fine, Rubenstein, Ehlvest)

Scorpio the Scorpion (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21). You are shrewd and cannot be trusted .You may develop a drinking problem later in life. You have many secrets, like being a Nazi. You lose games to idiots by being over-confident. (Alekhine, Tal, Capablanca).

Sagittarius the Archer ( Nov. 22 to Dec. 21). You are enthusiastic when you play. You have a tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. You collect chess books but don’t read them. You are a fast player and lover. (Reshevsky, Pillsbury, Blackburne , Anand).

Capricorn the Goat (Dec. 23 to Jan. 19). You are afraid of taking risks. You don’t do much of anything and are lazy.

Opponents will win brilliancy prizes from you. You are a loner but seem to like it that way. You always end up in second place.(Keres, Browne, Lasker).

Aquarius the Water Carrier (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18). You have an inventive mind and play original openings. You are also careless and make the same mistakes. You are a poor loser. (Spassky, Mecking, Reinfeld, Taimanov).

Pisces the Fish (Feb. 19 to Mar. 20) You have a vivid imagination and think that you are being followed by the CIA or FBI.

You lack confidence and are generally a coward. You accept gambits. (Bronstein, Fischer, Tarrasch).